So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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