I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I think I just sharted jello shots
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
