It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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