when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
