I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
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