I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
