I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
