You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Randomize