i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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