taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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