Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
You pole danced in your parka.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
