I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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