No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
