Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
