It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
