its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize