Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
The best revenge is premature balding
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
