# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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