no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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