I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
