I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
