I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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