Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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