Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
