Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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