You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
