Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
