Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
