I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
