she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
party gras won. party gras always wins.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
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