He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Randomize
