The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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