I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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