Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Randomize
