1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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