I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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