i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
