I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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