i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Randomize
