so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
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