I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Randomize