i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Randomize
