Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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