"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
