You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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