she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
