I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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