I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
