Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
