Ambien. No doubt about it.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
